“For The Good of Others” Chapter 9

I want to thank my "Brother from Another," Mike, for his love, support, and contribution to my blog by writing Chapter 9 for me this week. I hope you love his message as I did.

When David first asked me to be a guest writer and part of his blog, I was both humbled and nervous. Humbled in being able to share with all of you, his followers, what we have experienced together over the past year during this specific spiritual chapter in our lives. Nervous, because now I am being asked to write in his blog, where I believe we can all agree he has a way with words that touch the heart and bring the best out of you... something I now must try to measure up to.

To give me a head start, David suggested I write about when I first noticed his onset of ALS up until today. As tasked, this is exactly what I will do, but I would be remised not to mention the past 20 plus years when our journey began. Note, it's only the first paragraph and I'm getting emotional and teary eyed….oh David, I love you brother.

We started our journey together stationed at Fort Leonard Wood (FLW), MO. David was a Military Police Small Group Leader (MP SGL), and I was a Senior Drill Sergeant Instructor, both of us teaching at the FLW Maneuver Support Center. It was there that I met my beautiful bride to be, Denise (another MP SGL), and eventually her close friends David and Laura, the beautiful couple who I would find not too long after meeting them engaged in conversation on their thoughts of me marrying Denise. This included both their approval of the engagement ring and what was to be a once in a lifetime February wedding experience (6 months later we got married in the church 😊).

Although this was the wedding where Denise and I would join our beautiful families through matrimony, David in great fashion had a suggestion that we actually ran with. He stated,” Mike, you have an opportunity to make this memorable and I have an excellent idea.” I sat back in anticipation getting ready to hear his fabulous and creative idea from a man who has got to be one of the most creative and thoughtful persons I've ever met. I was thinking horse and carriage, weekend wedding on a cruise ship, or maybe some historical site where we could cherish these beautiful memories forever. Little did I know, and we actually went with it, Denise and I, and our children, got married in a bar in our pajamas! So there we were in bitter cold Missouri in three feet of snow running up to the bar with our slippers on……like I said, one of the most creative persons I've ever met!

As our journey continued, we would be involved in many military events to include the Sergeant Audie Murphy Club, where as members of this prestigious club we would clean up trash on the weekends with Adopt- A -Highway (with all our kids in tow I might add), collect items for school backpacks, Thanksgiving holiday food drives, and just a wide array of activities showing others what right looks like and what it truly means to embody the mantra of service to others before self. It came full circle, when the three of us spent time with our families as David gave us the 10-mile walking tour of DC sites to include a stop at Audie Murphy's gravesite.

Amongst many, another memorable event that comes to mind during our tour at Fort Leonard Wood, would be when David, Denise, and I earned our first college degree from Central Texas College (not the best photo…..please don’t share with my wife). For those who have served in the military, you know you can only be stationed together for so long, so we all parted ways but always stayed in touch.

As we continued to stay in touch over the years, not too long ago, Denise was talking to David and Laura and noticed it was difficult to understand what David was saying. She was very concerned and felt a calling to quickly make her way out to Virginia to spend time with both. It so happened to be the same week where David and Laura were getting the news of David's diagnosis. During the same timeframe, our eldest daughter Christine was getting married and invited David and Laura to join us in North Carolina for the special event. As expected, David and Laura did attend the wedding, and as expected, David and Laura went above and beyond to ensure Christine had a beautiful and memorable celebration. This included David on his own taking care of the groom and his groomsmen by setting up their room with all the amenities the dude’s could use to include poker chips and cards! Again, we parted ways, not knowing I would see David again in May.

I remember May 24th , as it was yesterday. David sent me a text which was the catalyst to our spiritual brotherhood. David asked me if I had a minute for a few questions. I let him know to call at his convenience. He stated, “Text is easier if you don't mind.” He then proceeded to let me know in text he was considering on getting baptized and was wondering if he was feeling this way now because he has ALS. He let me know that he does believe in God and really feels that for reasons he can't explain, he has ALS for a higher purpose. David DuBois, with a higher purpose? You certainly do Sir! He let me know he feels like there is something he needs to do with this, and he doesn't want this to be the reason to get baptized but feels spiritually in a stronger place than he's ever been. I explained to him that God knows what your intentions are and what He needs from you. I told him, “David, I believe you continue to live a faithful and selfless life and that's all that He would expect from you.” He let me know this is exactly how he lives, and he's been blessed since he met Laura because she has made him a better man. So, with that said, I surprised David by flying out for his baptism, blessed to have been a part of this beautiful ceremony.

Where the premise of this blog is supposed to encompass my experiences with David when I first noticed the onset of ALS till present day, I thought it was relevant to give his reading audience for those who don't know him as as his family and close friends of the man who's out front fighting this horrible disease and living with ALS.

Being blessed to have an office both in my hometown of Colorado Springs, CO and in Fairfax, Virginia, I'm afforded the opportunity every time I go to Fairfax to have dinner with David and Laura (every night) and share in his experiences, continually surrounding each other with love. I must tell you, nothing beats Laura’s chicken thighs coming straight out of the air fryer, a gourmet delicacy one must try……. and yes, Laura is laughing her a** off as she's reading this! Spending time with David and Laura, sometimes less than 30 days between each visit, I've been witness to the different stages David has gone through from garbled speech and minimal texting, and now not able to speak but still texting, and yes, he still comes off as a smart a**.

As we are aware, it is a terrible and unforgiving disease. Once a function is lost, be it the use of his right hand or his speech, unfortunately it is lost forever. it wasn’t too long ago when we were talking about what it would be like to receive a tracheotomy and if that was the next step he thought he might need to investigate. Well the day has come and David is currently recovering from his tracheotomy surgery. Another step in the process, and one David will not let defeat him. I admire David and I'm witness to his resilience, positive attitude, and his will to make a difference everyday through his selfless service placing others before himself.

During our numerous visits, we often share educational and inspiring articles, prayer videos, and authors like Mitch Albom (“Tuesdays with Morrie” ……a must read. Simple read and oh so inspirational) which bring peace and understanding to his/our spiritual journey. During my last visit, David shared with me a book he's been reading and a quote in which I believe sums up David's spiritual mission………“Ralph was asked if he would ever change anything about his life, and he unequivocally said, “I wouldn't change a thing.” Ralph who lived in a wheelchair all his life believed that the circumstances God gave him were meant to be for the good of others.”