“Priceless” Chapter 30

As my heart grows full, my body grows stronger.

It’s funny to say that when ALS is literally making my body weaker. Over the past year, though, I have been blessed with many visitors who have filled my home and my heart.

Before social media, I would say that we had a handful of people in our lives at any given time. For members of the military or anyone else that moves around a lot, that group changes every time we move to a new community. We tried to keep in touch with letters, but that inevitably always dwindled down to annual Christmas cards. We tried phone calls once a week, but that would become once a month, and then eventually we spoke only once a year. Too often, we let our lives get in the way of our social connections.

With the advent of texting and social media, we are truly more connected now then ever before. But are we truly better connected? Phone calls have been reduced to sending texts simply containing emojis. We send Snaps and Tweets so we don’t have to spend too much time typing out words. Remember when we took phone calls on the only phone in the house? You know the landline with the extra long cord. You'd hide around corners or in closets and hope there wasn't another phone in the house so no one would pick up and listen in or interrupt you.

Pen pals have been replaced by Facebook, LinkedIn, and Instagram where you can add pictures for everyone to comment on. We're no longer telling our deepest secrets to our closest friends, but trying to get likes from people we might not even know

We have all become advertising specialists when we really need genuine friendships more than ever. Our posts are intended to get likes and not real connection or advice from friends. When we do get genuine comments on our posts, we get butt hurt if they don’t agree with us, and if it’s really bad, we block them. Poof... friend gone!

Social media is not all bad. I have connected with more people from my past than I've ever been able to before, and these connections are important to me. Not being able to write or talk doesn’t stop me from being connected to people I'd be cut off from otherwise. The internet is a powerful tool that’s brought great joy and love in my life, especially during the last few years.

There is always a Reason, Season, and Lifetime when people come into our lives. I think we take relationships for granted, and before you know it, they are gone.  We look back at pictures or memories and wonder what happened to them.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. Maybe it is someone you've never met before, and they come into your life to meet what you need right now. This person may not be in your life for long, but they left an impression.

The other day, Laura was at the store and ran into a young salesman who assisted her. When she came home she told me about the encounter and how they had a very good conversation. She felt there was a reason why she went into that store on that particular day and spoke with him.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. But when the season ends, that relationship may end too. For military members, this happens a lot. Once we physically move on, often the relationship does too.

I have found that working on this blog is how I am able to be fully present in THIS season. I have met many people virtually who have provided me love and support, and I would never have met many of you readers if this was a published book instead.

LIFETIME people are present forever. Sometimes you wish they were only for a season, but ultimately they are there because they need to be. In my previous post I told you that I had lived in a foster home as a child. I lived in that particular home for a reason, even though I only stayed with them for a season. The law at the time required foster children to be moved every two years. You either moved back home, were adopted by a family, or placed in a new foster home. In my case, I moved home to live with my mom.

Before I moved back home, Mutti - my foster mom - asked if I wanted to stay with them or live with my mom. At 10 years old, that is a big decision and I did what I thought was best. I told Mutti I wanted to move home with my mom. My thoughts were to have my blood mother and get to see my brothers more. My request was granted and I will never know if I made the best decision, but it was what Mutti honored.

Mutti

Because that chapter of my life was so long ago, you would think that reason and season was done and over with. I have always felt a love and a piece missing in my heart, though. Lifetime people never go away. These are the people we fight for. The first year I exchanged letters with Mutti's family, but that ended without a reason.

Twenty-two years later, with the advent of the internet, Laura told me I should try to locate Mutti and the Cifra Family - my foster family from so long ago. After searching online using dial up internet (another thing our kids won’t know a thing about), I found my foster brother. I gave him a call and explained who I was. He said of course he remembered me because I am Awesome, and I asked for Mutti’s phone number. He informed me he would give them my number as anyones son should. After hanging up with him I received a phone about 30 minutes later with a voice on the other end asking me “is this David? My little David”? Mutti and I spoke at length as I updated her on my life, we laughed together, and had a wonderful conversation. We continued to call and visit each other after that day.

A few years later, Laura and I took the kids to visit Mutti and Opa in Florida for the Christmas holidays. During our visit, Mutti brought out a glass ornament and told me she hung it on her tree every year to remember me, and that this year, she would never have to hang it up again because we finally found each other. I hang the ornament up every year on my own tree now.

The ornament is now 45 years old

For the past 23 years, I have been warmly welcomed back into the Cifra Family. Weddings, visits, parties, and unfortunately some deaths as well. My three sisters, brother, and their children have all welcomed me. The love from them is undeniable and I am so grateful.

These days I also keep in touch with friends, family, and others via the same social media platforms that often seem to tear us apart. I am blessed that that I have been able to reconnect of you from seasons past, but you've also made the time to come to visit us in Virginia. These visits bring me life, and are one more reason I will not give up Living with ALS. These visits and reconnections fill my heart and make me stronger. Through my social media, I have met others for both a Reason or a Season, and many are becoming new Lifetime friends.

If there are two sides to this debate about social media, I am on the side that believes social media is succeeding in connecting us more than before. As with anything in life, too much can be a bad thing, but just enough can be a blessing and do wonders to fill your heart.

I hope to keep seeing you on social media, but I'd love seeing you in person even more.

Meeting someone for a reason is a gift, metting someone for a season is special, but meeting someone for a lifetime is PRICELESS.

Love and blessings.